Alternatively titled: Why Marissa has Stage Fright
  1. I've sung my entire life, but I've also been afraid of crowds my entire life.
    Those two don't go well together
  2. I grew up in a church choir and singing with others always made it easier for me.
    Except when it came to solos. "Silent night" still haunts my dreams.
  3. In the 7th grade I was in the school choir, and they needed someone to sing the national anthem for our cultural assembly
  4. They chose a handful of us to try out for it and I ended up getting picked to do it.
  5. However, it was for the whole school and our auditorium wasn't big enough so they split is into two assemblies.
    Basically, I had to do it twice.
  6. I was also the opener. I performed for the first assembly and on the line "AND THE ROCKETS RED GLARE," I squealed
    Straight up voice break. I sounded like I'd hit puberty mid-song
  7. I shakily finished the song and then went backstage and cried. Only to be told I needed to do it again....
    I sang so low at the second assembly that basically no one heard me.
  8. It was the beginning of the year so I remember hoping it would die down.
    Except everyone wrote about it in my yearbook. EVERYONE!
  9. After that I never joined a choir, refused to perform etc. until I was about 19.
    That scarred me for 8 years and was STILL brought up all throughout high school.
  10. I stopped hearing about it in college and was so excited. Everyone had forgotten!
    I've only been singing in front of people for the last couple of years and it still makes me nervous as all hell now.
  11. I even tried to redeem myself and sang the national anthem at a televised boxing event last year. I thought all was well.
  12. UNTIL
  13. Last week I was getting my hair done when my hair stylists husband came to visit her. From talking to her, I knew he'd gone to school with me but was a year older
  14. He came in and introduced himself and then he asked...
  15. "Do you sing?"
  16. Me: "uhm, sometimes."
    I assumed maybe he'd seen the video of me that some old friends had posted of a cover I did?
  17. "I thought I recognized you. It must've been back in high school, but you were in a talent show, right?"
  18. Me: "nope. I never did a talent show in high school."
  19. Him: "yeah! You sang the national anthem!"
  20. Me, internally freaking out: "that wasn't in high school. That was about 11 years ago."
    Oh no oh no oh no oh no THEY DIDNT FORGET
  21. Him: "that was in middle? No way! I can't believe I even remember that. Anyways, that's all I remembered you from."
  22. Me, forcing a smile: "oh, well that's good to know."
  23. Just when I thought everyone had forgotten
  24. And that fiasco had died
  25. It comes back to haunt me
  26. And that's the story about how I'm terrified of singing in front of crowds and no one will ever hear my songs because I'm scarred to this day BYE