SHIT MY SISTER HAS ACTUALLY TEXTED ME. PART 2

February's edition of "my sister is kind of a dick."
  1. On a scale of 1-"I'm a lil bitch"....how sick are you?
  2. Mom just tried to argue with me that I'm having intestinal pains because I'm constipated...but I'm on my period
  3. No? Fuck me then!
  4. If you see Nick Jonas or Chelsea Handler...give them a fat kiss for me
  5. Fuck. Off.
  6. Bring me something....because I've slept one full night in 9 nights. K FANKS
  7. Suck. My. Weina?
  8. I'm on the part where Brendan has to fill out the paper. This fucking kid.
  9. You still look like an old man
  10. #stayfat5ever
  11. I showed him a pic of you. Not like a "leave 5 min before work" pic though...like a "I spent 8 hours getting ready" pic
  12. Your future husband Riss.
    Stalker photo of her coworker included
  13. Aca-Scuse me?
  14. I got a 1.9 once in college. So that was cool.
  15. Riss...how in the hell did I graduate college with a better GPA than you
  16. I hope your fry sauce is made with Mason's special sauce.
  17. cuando se le recibiendo su pase a Planet Fitness ???
  18. Betch? I call you...no answer. But you can text me? Fuck. Off.
  19. Guess who just used the big boy potty?! Marissa did! Jk. But Maddox was pretty excited to go pee pee in the big boy potty