Look Like an A+ Employee in Your Office Without Actually Doing Any Work:

  1. Only speak in sports clichés
  2. Send random emails in the middle of the night
  3. List a bunch of certifications in your email signature
  4. Bring in brand name donuts
  5. Wear your headset into the bathroom
  6. Shake hands as hard as you can
  7. Grow a goatee