HOW TO ANNOY ME ON PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION

You people are animals
  1. Listen to music so loudly I can hear it clearly through your headphones, or - God forbid - listen to music without headphones
    The second one... just why?????
  2. Wear too much perfume/cologne
    This is an enclosed vehicle I'm suffocating over here
  3. Talk on the phone
    This might just be a personal problem but I really hate hearing people talk on the phone. It's harder to drown out than a normal conversation because you can only hear one side and it's jarring to hear just "ok...yep...no...mhmm." On the other hand if you are trying to eavesdrop to pass the time it's harder to figure out the context 😬
  4. Sit next to me when there are open seats elsewhere
    Just because I am small does not mean you get to take up 1.5 seats 😡😡😡
  5. Eat smelly food
    I eat on the train all the time. But I certainly do not eat full course meals that reek to the high heavens. We are all gonna be stuck on this train/bus/spaceship for a while and now you've tainted the air
  6. Talk/laugh loudly with your friends
    I usually commute alone so this is probably my subconscious jealousy talking... but please simmer down. You are right next to each other there is no need to scream ok OK
  7. Bring a young child along
    When I was a young child, I was a terror. So karma has dictated that I sit near the loudest, angriest, saddest, most aggressive children to exist on this sweet earth. They do not like long car/train/bus rides!! I don't blame them!! Don't subject them (or myself) to it. I could write a book on Parenting Styles Onboard NJT Trains.
  8. Be drunk
    We've all been there. But when you've had a long day/night and you're sober, the drunk shenanigans are not that entertaining (usually).
  9. Get out of your seat/stand/gather your belongings when we enter the tunnel going into New York
    Hun, it's gonna be at least 7-10 minutes before we pull up to the platform. Take a seat, you're making me anxious.
  10. Burp/fart/sneeze/cough a lot/etc.
    No thx