THOUGHTS RIGHT AFTER I DRANK A SHIT TON OF REAL COFFEE

Normally I just drink instant coffee. I'm wired. I need to attack hug @katiemurphy NOW.
  1. School is dumb but also not dumb
  2. How come I was born American? I literally coulda been born anywhere else.
  3. I feel like if I weren't a Mary, I'd be like a Grace, or a Janet, or a Rachel. I am not partial to any of those names I just feel like that's what I look like.
  4. When you're pregnant there's a brain inside you. Somehow that freaks me out more that saying there's a human body inside you.
  5. Do baby's fart inside you when your pregnant? Do I want to know?
  6. Blehg being pregnant, like, what gives God?
  7. Like I get it - it's a baby and moms just accept it bc their body is just doing what's "natural" but like ew. That shit is not natural in my books.
  8. My sister in law is pregnant and I she made me touch her belly and I felt the baby's butt. Or head. Murphys have big heads so we weren't sure.
  9. This list just became a list about my thoughts on pregnancy. Srry not srry but also srry.
  10. Ew I was once a baby.
  11. Gross I was inside my mom.
  12. Ew.
  13. I wonder what Daniel Radcliffe is doing right now?
  14. Celebrities are dumb but also they are people too. Maybe we just need to chill?
  15. My Facebook trending topics are all about the Kardashions and Jenners...is this the same for everyone?
  16. Are coffee shits real?
  17. Lol guess we'll find out.