At the barber shop today...

  1. Park your stogie between the screw and the window on your way in.
  2. "It's hard to believe they can't come up with two people better than Hilary & Trump."
  3. "The government has been doing a shit job."
  4. "The Republican Party did this to themselves. Serves 'm right."
  5. Dropped off by a customer.
  6. "I bought a new truck. I'm 70. I figured why should I leave all my money to my kids. They'll just piss it all away."
  7. "That's why we get old and croak, Tony. We can't deal with the changes."
  8. "They need to put some factories in the cities. Give the poor black people some place to work and make a living."
  9. "A customer of mine just had his teeth fixed in Paraguay. I think it was Paraguay. Someplace that starts with a "p". Cost him $2200. They wanted $8500 here. Told me he had gorgeous, legal prostitutes come to his room each night. Said he still saved money!"