Here are things we do each year that bring us close to the great divide.
  1. Scaling the roof to hang lights.
  2. Driving within 300 yards of a mall between Thanksgiving and Christmas Day.
  3. Getting in the front of the line before a store opens on Black Friday.
  4. Cutting down trees with a saw as a family.
  5. Attaching trees to the roof of your vehicle and driving down the interstate.
  6. Following behind someone with a tree attached to their roof on the interstate.
  7. Lighting fires with giant socks hanging from your fireplace.
  8. Festively weaving electrical current through a tree...in our house.
  9. Leaving said fire hazard on while we sleep.
  10. Giving kids large amounts of sugar from October 30th-January 1st.