Like any red-blooded American male, I was raised on Disney movies. As a side effect, many of my early crushes came from these movies. A few of these crushes are somewhat problematic.
- •Ariel (The Little Mermaid)I have no proof of this, but Ariel's transformation scene might have been the first moment of my sexual awakening.
- •Pocahontas (Pocahontas)Why, yes, I do in fact know why the grinning bobcat grins.
- •Mary Poppins (Mary Poppins)Hot for nanny.
- •Belle (Beauty and the Beast)Started my love affair with voracious readers.
- •Jasmine (Aladdin)Bare midriff and pet tiger? That's a killer one-two punch.
- •Faline (Bambi)This one might have been a bit confusing.
- •Nala (The Lion King)See above.
- •Susan Evers/Sharon McKendrick (The Parent Trap)What young lad wasn't emotionally devastated to find out there is in fact only one Hayley Mills?
- •Jenny (Oliver & Company)My hipster pick. Y'all don't know nothing about this.
- •Miss Price (Bedknobs and Broomsticks)Infatuation, she wrote. (Note: I mentally rejected so many dirty jokes for this caption)
- •Robin Hood (Robin Hood)Please don't ask me to explain this one. I'm just trying to keep it real.