The Story Behind #staymarried
Or... How I decided to do my part...
- •Got a text from a friend, then a phone call.She'd cheated on her husband. She'd confessed to him. She wanted to talk to ME about it. Blurgh!
- •She wasn't the first.Just the latest in what felt like an epidemic of friends going through hell in their marriages.
- •I couldn't sleep.I've always dealt with mild depression (dysthymia) but now I also had anxiety and insomnia. I wondered what was the point of marriage at all and was sure my own marriage was doomed to failure.
- •I started researching.There had to be more to it. Is anyone out there really glad they got married? Was my own marriage just a timebomb of heartache waiting to explode?
- •I started Tweeting with the hashtag #staymarriedI decided to turn my despair and anger over divorce into encouragement for my friends who WERE still married. I tweeted things like: A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers. #staymarried People liked it.
- •Other people started talking to ME about marriage.140 characters didn't seem like enough. I'd learned a lot in my research about what a successful marriage looked like and I wanted to share what I learned.
- •My husband @TonyPeterson designed a site.I started writing. Katie the Editor started editing. The #staymarried Blog was born.
- •Odds are, I won't stay marriedThat's the first post I published, sharing my background and the stats against my own marriage. That post set the tone for everything else we've done with #staymarried. You can read it here if you want... http://staymarriedblog.com/odds-are-i-wont-stay-married/
- •That was in 2012.We've since partnered with The Gottman Institute (foremost researchers in marriage and relationships) produced The #staymarried Podcast series, and now I'm working on The #staymarried Book.
- •Instagram turned out to be my favorite.We still blog and podcast, but Insta is where we engage the most. I like seeing how people use the #staymarried hashtag on their own photos and engage with the quick bites we post.
- •Could li.st be next?Now that I'm here, I wonder if #staymarried lists would be helpful... Thanks @mallofamanda for the great list request!
- •(Added) Doh! Forgot to mention that my friend, the one that texted, she and her husband are still married and are BOTH working hard to repair the damage.HOPE!