1. is my dad's fault
    when teaching me to drive, he'd get mad at me for not driving in the faster lane or waiting too long at a stop sign. now that i have permanent road rage, he only passive aggressively makes it clear that he does not approve of my decision-making behind the wheel
  2. is a turn off to myself
    i get so ugly for no reason. i gotta chill
  3. saves me from accidents
    defensive driving on dat ass
  4. is not unwarranted!
    mfs can't drive like frfr