Things I did while drunk and should regret but don't.

  1. Thinking I dreamt that I feed a Coati my ice cream cone while I was in Mexico until my son showed me the video on his phone.
  2. Playing tambourine on stage to Purple Rain on my birthday one year. It's a really looong song, but now that Prince died on my birthday it all makes sense.
  3. Taking over the hostess job at a bar and seating people. I felt like she deserved a break.
  4. Crashing a wedding with my friends during a power outage at the hotel we were staying at and helping ourselves to cake.
  5. Negotiating a round of shots with the bartender via the waitress until I got the price I wanted.
  6. Telling people that out girls weekend was a cuntology convention where we gave free services to needy cunts.
  7. What have you done while drunk that you don't regret?