1. OCD about his eyebrows
  2. Very comfortable vacationing alone
  3. Awful wingman
  4. Tried a deeper voice on day one of his job and was never able to walk it back
  5. Addicted to Pirate Booty
  6. Admires Doug Stamper's graceful transition to baldness and wishes he would have told him so
  7. Jeff Dunham's No. 1 fan
  8. Daydreams about taking a bullet, like, every day. A real The Bodyguard sitch.
    Suggested by @videodrew
  9. Doesn't actually read.
    Suggested by @videodrew
  10. Wishes he could make eye contact with Remy and always promises himself that next time, he'll finally do that chill head nod he's been practicing in the mirror.
    Suggested by @videodrew