1. Judy Blume's new novel should be about Drake. Nobody feels things as hard as Drake!
  2. To be fair, Kanye had his jaw wired shut, so he's making up for lost talking time.
  3. If we're all being honest, Macklemore's coat is a Sandals for bedbugs.
  4. What is the ETA on Space Jam 2 starring Lil Wayne and Marvin the Martian? Wait, they haven't even thought of it yet?
  5. I do worry about 50 Cent, all alone in his Connecticut Versailles.
  6. Every night, the earth angel that is Kid Cudi sings a lullaby that all the world's children can hear, but adults can't (much like the bell from the Polar Express).
  7. Wiz Khalifa is a modern day Mr. Darcy. (See "Promises")