The shallow kind none of this wealth of spirit junk
- •You never google something "+ promo code"
- •When you send someone flowers you just say what flowers you want and don't discuss budget. You say "it should look substantial"
- •You really do throw out your mascara every six months like they say to do
- •You have a classy answer for everything in the Vanity Fair My Stuff questionnaire
- •You fly first class and don't make smug eye contact with the coachbound losers as they board. You're busy knowing what to do with the warm towel
- •It makes you laugh so hard how bad you are at blackjack
- •When you hear people talking about reality TV exploiting the poor you assume they're discussing the brew dogs from the esquire network