THINGS YOU CAN DO RATHER THAN LOOK ON YOUR GODDAMN PHONE WHILE RIDING PUBLIC TRANSIT

  1. Form a kick line with other passengers
  2. Zip and unzip your coat repeatedly
  3. Engage in a session of psychotherapy with a certified therapist
  4. Put your hair in curlers
  5. Play patty cake with the person sitting next to you (or yourself!)
  6. Eat a tub of deviled eggs
  7. Dance to the smash-hit "Cupid's Shuffle"
  8. Ask someone how many push ups they think you could do
  9. Wrap a present with half-off Christmas wrapping paper
  10. Jump rope double dutch style
  11. Yell out all of the ingredients to your favorite Subway sandwich