Date Me and I'll Never Ask You To
- •Hold my purseThat's what the floor/hook on the stall/ my arms are for.
- •Kill spidersUnless you want to. I'm content with my stun-them-hairspray-first method.
- •Wear matching costumesI ain't doing the creative heavy-lifting for both of us.
- •Put the seat downI can spare 3 seconds to do it myself.
- •Tag me as your #wcwI like you, you like me, the Internet can let it be.
- •Go to my friends' birthday partiesWe don't have to travel as a unit.