How I Run a Mile

My inner dialogue during the most awful task at the gym
  1. 0:00 - ~bracing myself for the worst 11 minutes of my life~
  2. 0:36 – I need a BADASS song. Or maybe I’ll just listen to the new Weezer album (again)
  3. 1:00 – I already hate every part of this
  4. 1:22 – TALLER, BETTER, FASTER, STRONGER is what you’ll be when you finish this
  5. 2:48 – Just remember that YOU ARE RAD
  6. 3:15 – The only good part about this is that I’m wearing a Michigan tank and purple shoes and people are probably jealous of both
  7. 4:00 – why
  8. 4:14 – This is agony.
  9. 5:25 – Hey, who created running? Because I could kill them
  10. 6:17 – ARE WE THERE YET
  11. 6:57 – What should I eat for dinner?
  12. 7:34 – How do people run marathons? It doesn’t seem very American
  13. 8:12 – I wonder if there are any bikes open because I just want to sit down right now
  14. 8:45 – Would it be shameful to leave the gym after this is over?
  15. 9:30 – Should I increase the speed on my treadmill so that this ends sooner?
  16. 10:18 – Who am I? Not a runner, that’s for sure
  17. 10:34 – I can’t wait to go home and watch Jane the Virgin
  18. 11:28 – omg I want to thank my family and New York Sports Club and everyone who believed that I could do this. Oh the music is playing me off, ok, this is stressful, thank you GOD and friends and Obama.