Thoughts of a College Roommate Searching Under Her Bed for Her Glasses

Inspired by @dfly
  1. What just fell...
  2. Those were my glasses, weren't they?
  3. Do I really need glasses?
  4. I have contacts. Glasses are optional.
  5. I am not leaving this room. Why would I waste a perfectly good set of contacts today?
  6. Okay, fine. I need my glasses.
  7. Wow, my knees hurt.
  8. Why is this crawl space so short? If it's used for storage shouldn't they plan for dumb college students needing to crawl under the bed???
  9. Ow, my knees hurt.
  10. I'm 18 not 80. You can't complain about your knees when you're 18.
  11. Wait, is that mean to 80 year olds?
  12. I'm sorry, grandma.
  13. Okay, but seriously, OW?!
  14. These pajama pants were $10. This is nowhere near enough padding for crawling on my knees over tile floors.
  15. Oh, look. My glasses.
  16. That is also my pencil.
  17. Oh, look, earbuds.
  18. Are those my earbuds?
  19. No, I know where my earbuds are. This is a bunk bed. Those are clearly not my earbuds.
  20. ...I need new earbuds.
  21. Okay, that is disgusting. I'm not going to take another person's earbuds from the floor of our disgusting room.
  22. I REALLY need new earbuds...
  23. If I wipe these really well with an alcohol swab, they should be fine, right?
  24. ...I'm a broke college student. I'm claiming these earbuds.
  25. ...But now I have two sets of earbuds...
  26. One pair must go.
  27. I'm so sorry, old earbuds.
  28. I'm a disgusting human being.