DEAR POKEMON GO USERS,

I think maybe you're called "trainers"?
  1. I believe there's something special at the track.
  2. You see, I know nothing about Pokemon go except that every time I go running, there are hordes of you gathered.
  3. Honestly, you guys look pretty idiotic standing amidst historic relics staring at your phone while the sun gloriously sets behind you.
  4. But hey, I'm honestly glad you're having fun.
  5. There is one thing I'd like to address though.
  6. When you walk on the track or across the track, please be considerate of runners.
  7. I mean, I know real life people aren't nearly as interesting as pixels or as deserving of your respect as animated creatures, but still.
  8. I end up running more on the grass to avoid running into you than I do on the actual track.
  9. Just to clear the air, when we make eye contact as I step of the beaten path, I don't mean to be rude.
  10. I'm just genuinely curious why you think you should stand in the middle of the track, walk back and forth across it, and know full-well that people are trying to use the track for its intended purpose.
  11. I wonder, would you be nicer to me if I dressed up like a Pokemon and made funny noises as I ran? Please let me know if this would allow me to effectively run around the track.
  12. Sincerely,
  13. Poor girl desperately trying to get in shape