REASONS I BELONG IN A WARM CLIMATE

instead of whining to my friends/family, who live in the same climate as me (and thus who have no sympathy for me) I am complaining to the Internet void - this list will be updated all season probably.
  1. I have tried it and I don't like the winter
    My Mom told me I only have to try something new 3 times and if I hate it I never have to try it again. She was mostly talking about broccoli. It applies to everything.
  2. I like the rain
    When I tell people I need to move to a warm place they always say "but the rain!!" To which I say, rain will only remind me that it is not snowing. You don't have to shovel rain. I don't care if I get wet (also cars/buses). Snow sucks. Shut up.
  3. I don't do winter sports
    it's the only fun part of winter what is the point of Canada if I cannot ski? Last time I tried I very nearly died (for real, I almost ran into a large evergreen tree - it was pointy)
  4. My joints
    I am almost twenty. My knuckles and knees ache. From the cold. I'm pretty sure I got frostbite. This problem clearly only applies to me. I never hear anybody else complain about their cold-induced temporary arthritis.
  5. Times I almost died because of ice today: 2
  6. I want to cry every time I go outside
    but I can't. My tears might freeze. I hate it here.
  7. I am always cold
    self explanatory but I don't like being cold
  8. Regulating temperature = impossible
    I dress for outside and then start sweating in 1 minute when I go inside, or freeze to my core in less than 25 seconds if I don't dress for the weather.