THINGS I'VE LEARNED AFTER WORKING AT VICTORIA'S SECRET

  1. Men think there are only two types of underwear women wear.
    It's not a boxers/briefs type of deal. There are at least ten different types. And yes, I can name all of them.
  2. Over 75% of women wear the wrong bra size.
    Let me remeasure you when I ask. I'm asking because I can see you have a double boob thing going on through your shirt. The right size will make a difference.
  3. I can spot a cheater/a sugar daddy/a man who needs help from a mile away.
    You're not a slick cheater. You're getting three different sizes and want them wrapped separately and pay in cash. Or you take all my suggestions while the clearly younger lady you're with is overjoyed. Or you're wandering around like a deer in headlights.
  4. Wear your bra on the loosest hook and you should be able to put three fingers under the band and pull.
    I could write a list on how a proper bra should fit. If your bra is on the tightest hook, it's too big. If it's on the loosest one and you have no space for your fingers, it's too tight. You should be able to pull back maybe an inch and have some give.
  5. Become confident in your own skin.
    I am by no means skinny. But I hold myself confidently because I know I won't ever be 100 lbs again. I like the way I look naked. I like the way my bras look.
  6. People will yell at you for ridiculous reasons.
    I'm sorry I don't have a sewing machine set up in the back to make you all of your wildest dreams. I'm not in charge of the inventory or delivery schedule. I'm sorry I'm asking for your ID to double check for security reasons that no one is fraudulent using your card. I'm sorry you have to spend holidays with your family on vacation while I'm stuck in the ninth circle of hell.
  7. People are savages.
    You leave your trash everywhere. You leave everything you tried on in the fitting room, making it look like the Tasmanian Devil whirled through.
  8. Men will buy more than women do.
    I get it, bras are expensive. But guys are willing to spend more money because of the idea of lingerie as a gift is exciting.
  9. My bar trick is being able to guess women's bra sizes.
    I've become an amazing wing woman because of this. I don't have to measure you- I just have to look. I've been able to do this for sometime now.
  10. When people say "so it must be free?" It's still not funny.
    Because chances are, I've heard it at least three times before that same day. And I wish I could overcharge you just for that comment.
  11. The men I work with probably know more about bras and panties than most men.
    I would ask and reask them about collections, and bra types, and panties because customers are always around. The men at VS are all pretty well rounded too. And they aren't always gay so stop assuming.
  12. Most people (men and women alike) don't know the difference between a push up and a demi.
    There's so many bras they sell with so many different types of padding. I'm sorry to bombard you with so many questions but I'm trying to figure out your favorite bra you have at home with very little information to go off of.