1. Oh my god boy texted
  2. What does he mean by 'what are you up to tonight'?
  3. I have not seen boy in three weeks, since we ran into each other at Katie's party
  4. Does he want to go out with me tonight?
  5. Why does he think I don't have plans?
  6. It's 2 pm: does he seriously think he can ask me out at 2pm and I'll just drop everything to see him on such short notice?
  7. I don't have plans tonight. And I would like to see him.
  8. But he didn't even use punctuation: if he really cared about me he'd have used punctuation
  9. I bet he had someone cancel on him and he's just going through his list of back ups. He probably sent that text to like five other girls
  10. Oh my god was Jennifer one of them? They were totally flirting at Katie's birthday
  11. I don't like Jennifer. Because she's not nice, not because I'm jealous of her arm definition.
  12. How does she get such good arm definition? I should get back into Pilates. I wonder if there are any offers on groupon.
  13. Oh my god wait. No. Shit. I know exactly what's going on here: boy and Jennifer hooked up after Katie's party. That's why he didn't come to acme and that's why I haven't seen him in three weeks: they've been dating. And now they've broken up and he's texting me to get back at her. It all makes so much sense.
  14. Oh my god. He is SUCH an asshole. Who does he even think he is? I am so not texting back. Ugh!
  15. (38 minutes later, looking sheepishly at phone): maybe he's really upset about the break up. Maybe he just needs a friend. I could be his friend - make dinner, listen, watch some bad tv. Show that I'm cool with everything
  16. Or maybe he knows he made a mistake. Maybe he's feeling bad about choosing Jennifer instead of me and wants to start fresh. Maybe he's realized that there's more to beauty than great arm definition.
  17. We all make mistakes. I can forgive him.
  18. It's almost 3 now: I should probably text back if I want to see him tonight. But what do I say?
  19. 'Nothing planned'? That makes me sound like a loser. 'Just hanging out at home'? What? Am I also going to admit I want a cat? DELETE. Shit: I should ask Meredith - she's good at this
  20. (After consulting Meredith, Janet and the gay assistant on the 7th floor): okay: typing. 'Hey there - was going to lay low but could be tempted not to - what's up?' That's good right? Or should I not use the question mark since he didn't? Shit I don't know
  21. Maybe I should wait another hour to send - I don't want it to seem like this is all I've been doing all day. But then he'll see the bubbles and know I've started typing. Crap!!
  22. Okay: send.
  23. (10 minutes later) oh my god why is he not texting back?
  24. (15 minutes later) should I text again? What if it didn't go through?
  25. (1 hour later): what did I do wrong? I knew I shouldn't have texted. I hate men in this city.
  26. Whatever I don't even care. His loss. I am so totally happy I'm single.