THINGS I HATE

The list that will never end..
  1. People tweeting about sports
    Fine: "Go Ducks!" It's pretty annoying to me, because I don't care. But it's your Twitter, and you have the right to support your team.. Not Fine: "I'll take the W, but we don't look anything like a Stanley Cup hockey team. Keep that upward momentum, gents! #LetsGoDucks" Seriously? Who the hell do you think you are? Unless you're getting paid to tweet that shit, save it for your reddit sub page. (The day Brent gets this app I'm dead)
  2. The fact that I feel guilty about gossiping
    It's truly my favorite pastime, and 95% of the foundation with most of my friends
  3. Romantic mushy gushy shit on social media
    Am I jealous? Yeah. Would I do it if I was in a relationship? I dunno, probably, but I mean, I hope not.
  4. Taylor Swift
    I really do. And I'm not even sorry. Pull your music from Spotify, um okay I'll just download it illegally for free?
  5. That Firefly got cancelled after one season
    But honestly who doesn't hate that?
  6. That all my Christian friends follow me on Twitter
    So I can't talk about the guys I want to jump, my feelings about my period, the sexy underwear I'm wearing, the fact that I'm not wearing any underwear at all, my burning desire to get my nipples pierced, and many more things...this probably deserves a list of its own hmmm..
  7. When my jaw gets sore from chewing too much gum
    Happens all the time because I'm obsessed with spearmint 5 gum.
  8. People not using their turn signals when they're turning
    If you're just switching lanes, I'll forgive you. If you're turning a corner just use your effing signal, it's the law, and it's hella annoying.
  9. Your kid
    Okay I don't actually hate your kid! Buuut I also don't want to watch you swipe through 50 pictures on your iPhone while you tell me about the "funny" thing that happened the other day at the school book fair.
  10. Evies Instagram
    I don't know what it is about it, but it makes me SO. MAD. We have group chat dedicated to discussing what the fuck is going on in it (that and sending each other photos of the sky? Honestly I don't know what we're doing over there) which makes me feel even worse (see gossiping guilt above) which makes me hate it even more.
  11. The fact the flower crowns are now reserved for festival attending trash
    Listen, I've been making flower crowns since I was 4, I still want to wear them but people will think I'm conformist liberal hippie scum. I JUST LIKE TO HAVE FLOWERS IN MY HAIR OKAY
  12. How calling my friends babe casually, makes me feel weird
    I want to do it all the time, but I can never really get it out my mouth. Too scared of people thinking I'm a lesbian I guess, but I'm not, and no one would think that anyways. So I should probably isn't do it.
  13. When the fortune I got from a fortune cookie doesn't come true
    Empty promises to go with all the empty calories in chow mein
  14. Private social media
    I can guarantee you that whatever you're instagraming/tweeting does not need to be set to private. What's the point of having social media if you won't let people see it? JUST LET ME STALK YOU DAMN IT!
  15. Overdraft fees
    Fuck you Wells Fargo