WHY I COULD NEVER LIVE WITH SOMEONE I WASN'T HAVING SEX WITH
A very dear friend of mine stayed on my couch this week, and though he and I get along very well, two days into his stay I found myself becoming extremely irritable. Here's why:
- •The physical act of having to clothe myself became frustrating. Just to walk to the bathroom, or to get a glass of water, or just when I would rather be less clothed.Obviously, when you're with a girlfriend or a boyfriend, nakedness isn't a concern, but with a friend you're not sleeping with, it would be weird.
- •The ongoing bits and voices we do when we see each other ceaselessly merged into everyday life and I found myself getting extremely annoyed by our inability to have a normal conversation.This merges with the one from above. There is such thing as it being tok early to be funny sometimes.
- •Walking into the apartment to find my friend there, smoking in mid-afternoon, an indulgence I only allow myself at night.When I think about it, this is where it all started for me and I probably should have spoken up. Instead I pretended like it was okay and subconsciously started creating this list.
- •Walking into the apartment and smelling a musky man scent that doesn't belong to me.Sorry, but if I'm paying as much as I am for this place it should only smell like one person.
- •I started to feel lazy or selfish if I was sitting on the couch with nothing for more than an hour because they'd be sitting there watching me.My relaxation was compromised slightly by his existential anxieties.
- •Mostly, I think because I've never lived with anyone other than my parents and girlfriend it's very foreign to have to share my private space with someone else.If I HAD to that's a another story...