Ways for People to Contact Me According to Preference

  1. 1.
    For all seasons and reasons. Forever.
  2. 2.
    It's comforting to know that I am in touch with someone who can see the same emojis I do.
  3. 3.
    Feels somewhat more reliable in the data-challenged country that I live in.
  4. 4.
    Fine. I'll use a messaging app.
  5. 5.
    No freaking clue why people prefer Viber.
  6. 6.
    Facebook Messenger
    Do not contact me via Facebook.
  7. 7.
    Calling to speak to an actual person is only acceptable to relay good news, to communicate in life or death situations, to avert anxiety attacks, to order for pizza.
  8. 8.
    Snail mail.
    These are just bills!