Why Life Is Not Like Movies

Inspired by @paulfeig, who is ultra cool (hi, Paul!)
  1. Your "training montage" consists of you eating junk food in bed.
  2. You probably don't want to get involved with that super "quirky" girl wearing Warby Parkers at the bar.
  3. You actually have to pay attention to traffic while you're driving.
  4. Your clothes aren't perfectly curated to say something psychologically profound about you.
  5. You don't speak in Cameron Crowe-isms.