HOW YOU COULD TELL I WAS A NY TOURIST

  1. I occasionally looked strangers in the eyes
  2. I treated a bodega with too much reverence for a sober person
  3. I said "excuse me" while waiting for the crosswalk sign
  4. I asked anyone who would listen for advice on moving to NY
    HINT HINT give me advice plz
  5. I waited for the non-existent 2am B train for 30 minutes
  6. I kept asking for "a real pizza place" without defining what that means
  7. I wore outfits that looked like they had been pieced together from a rarely updated "winter clothes" bin
    because they had
  8. I loudly declared we were heading to Zabars in an attempt to earn street cred
  9. I sat at JFK making lists as a way to brag about my trip
  10. I was too excited when people assumed I was from New York
    It was probably the hair.