Things I saw in Boulder, Colorado

Only one legal marijuana-related thing so don't get excited
  1. These big rocks
    People call them the Flatirons. They made me kind of sick to my stomach when I thought about how they formed. I grew up in Iowa so mountains and oceans are still hard to comprehend.
  2. An empty package of Snoop Dogg brand legal weed in "Shatter" form
    No one knew what "Shatter" was. After some hasty research we decided it was some form of "dabs". No one knew exactly what "dabs" were either but we did not discuss or research further.
  3. These pants (that I wore)
    The color was described as "Bold Squash".
  4. A digital scale that weighed espresso shots
    My initial disgust at the ridiculousness was outweighed (pun intended) by the deliciousness of the espresso.
  5. My new favorite human
  6. A guinea pig eating basil
  7. This outlet cover that reminded me of the guinea pig
    Can neither confirm nor deny that it eats basil, too.
  8. A squirrel eating a cookie
  9. The same squirrel eating a rice cake
  10. My wife's new style
    No idea what to call it. No, it's not what she wore at the wedding. Oh, yeah! We saw two people get married, too!