POTENTIAL CAREERS

Because I really should start having an answer for when people ask me what I'm going to do once I'm done school.
  1. Maury
    Yes, as in the daytime television show host. He has to retire sometime...
  2. Lena Dunham's Personal Adorer
    Devoted, unwavering and loyal.
  3. Billy Eichner's Camera Man
    Think about it, you'd meet some pretty cool/crazy people, would constantly be laughing, and think about the weight you would lose running around after that lunatic. (And I say lunatic in the most flattering way possible. I worship that lunatic)
  4. Art House Theatre Projectionist
    I mean really, being paid to sit around and watch movies all day? The. Dream. But you have to know how to work the projectors and it's probably a union thing...
  5. Arcade Fire Groupie
    But I doubt they're hiring.
  6. Sitcom Writer
    I've always said my life is one irony filled joke after another. I might as well put them into a television show and turn my suffering into some cold hard cash.
  7. Sex Columnist
    Like a modern Carrie Bradshaw, but with less innuendos and a lot more Tinder horror stories.
  8. Full Time Coffee Shop Writer
    That's pretty much what I do right now. It doesn't pay well.