How to Make an Adult PiÑata

This is the greatest birthday present of all time.
  1. Buy a piñata.
  2. I prefer traditional brightly-colored animals (burro, giraffe, etc) but go with your heart.
  3. Fill the piñata with small adult-appropriate treasures, such as:
  4. Airplane booze (only plastic bottles)
  5. Lottery scratch-off tickets
  6. Momofuku cake balls
  7. Drugs of any kind
  8. Tide pens
  9. Crest white strips
  10. Visine
  11. Kiehls lip salve
  12. $10 Metro Cards
  13. Malin + Goetz travel-size shampoo
  14. Once you've assembled your treasures, stuff the piñata and present it to your loved one with a smacking instrument.
  15. Feel free to trade goodies with other party guests. (This is the fun part.)
  16. Enjoy!