Things I currently (as an adult) do not have

  1. Money in my savings account
  2. A job that uses my college degree
  3. Immediate plans to use my college degree
  4. Water in my Brita filter
  5. Clean clothes for work tomorrow
  6. A guy who who doesn't say things like "I want to get in your pants"
  7. Any taste in wine
  8. A 401k
    Also filed under "Things I secretly don't know what they are"
  9. A pair of jeans that makes me look good and automatically DELETES my muffin top
  10. A photo editing app (see above)