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2017 is delayed by one day due to absolutely fucking not. Today is cancelled until further notice. Please feel free to enjoy New Years Eve 2.0 as we prepare to welcome the new year on Jan 2
  1. It rained all fucking day
  2. I have serious chest nose and throat pain
  3. A massive destructive argument with my parents made today shit
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  1. The school bus was the only way to get to a field trip location
  2. Santa loved my brother more than me
  3. Jesus was Jewish and therefore hated Christians
    Arguably still true
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Terms that aren't endearment
  1. You are a sight for sore eyes
    Ouch? Sometimes I tell my sister she's a sight for eye sores. At least it's straightforward
  2. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree
    Okay but what if I disagree fundamentally with my tree.
  3. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger
    I want to personally thank Kelly Clarkson for her contribution to music but what doesn't kill you sometimes leaves you nearly dead and I think it's important to acknowledge that struggle
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  1. Overindulgence
  2. Crippling anxiety
  3. Volunteering cheerfully to go on vacation with your boss/friend and her twin one year olds and by the way no air condition and by the way it's 97 degrees outside and by the way you didn't bring the correct sunscreen and by the way one of the twins will need to sleep with you
Why do I still have this Lizzy McGuire bedspread?
  1. Dinner
  2. Dessert
  3. A show
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I've been soul searching so I deleted the list app (you know I ran out of memory on my phone) and I'm so sorry because I missed you guys but now I'm back
  1. I have almost completed a 24 credit hour semester and now I'm going to graduate early
    Yes bitch I might finish undergrad before 25!!
  2. I broke up with my boyfriend and have been discovering my sexuality/casually dating a few girls
    And wow how fun
  3. I might go to law school!
    Because I hate myself
  4. Wow how boring fml
    Love you guys glad to be back
  1. I made this list and then ironically left it in my drafts for three months and came back to announce to everyone:
  2. Not to worry, I didn't stick with anything and I'm still as flakey as always
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