Ten Reasons Why My Kids Are Jerks

Inspired by @puppsmcgee
  1. 1.
    They wake up refreshed at 6 am while I'm dragging my feet.
  2. 2.
    They don't let me pee alone
  3. 3.
    They eat all the food
  4. 4.
    They repeat things I say in public that I shouldn't have said and make me look a fool
  5. 5.
    They remember all the rules...even the ones I want to break
  6. 6.
    They don't let me sleep in
  7. 7.
    They act like me asking them to do a simple chore is the end of the world
  8. 8.
    They throw their food on the floor
  9. 9.
    They throw such an epic fit in public that I break down and cry
  10. 10.
    They wake you up in the middle of the night to tell you useless facts that are an emergency to them