CRIMES THAT MAKE ME RETHINK MY STANCE ON THE DEATH PENALTY (I'M AGAINST IT)

  1. 1.
    Texting on your phone in a movie theater
  2. 2.
    Surfing the Internet on your phone in a movie theater
  3. 3.
    Touching your phone in any fashion that produces light or sound in a movie theater
  4. 4.
    Taking the elevator less than two floors if you are able bodied
  5. 5.
    Farting near diners in a restaurant
  6. 6.
    Mutilating cats and dogs
  7. 7.
    Prefacing cruel or insulting statements with "no offense"
  8. 8.
    Refusing to watch Star Wars in a misguided attempt to look cool