1. I have to set a timer to do important things.
    Ok, you have 5 minutes to write and send this dang email. 3 minutes to load the dishwasher. 3 minutes to refill your pill case, go!
  2. I punch the lid of my electric kettle every morning to unjam it so I can fill it with water.
    Why buy a new kettle when you can drum on the lid of your old one?
  3. I write with a yellow Lamy Safari fountain pen, and I always get ink stains on my fingers when I refill it.
    Extra fine nib and waterman's absolute brown ink. I know it seems pretentious to use a fountain pen but I love it and I don't care.
  4. I keep Bed Bath and Beyond coupons in my glove compartment.
    I've yet to use one.
  5. I always have library books in my car.
    And they're usually overdue and strewn all over the front seat.
  6. I talk back to Melvyn Bragg when I listen to "In Our Time"
    Oh my GOD just let them FINISH A THOUGHT before you race in with yours, you grumpy sod.
  7. I forget my clothes in the dryer weekly.
  8. I use "actually..." in conversation way too often.
    Once, a guy told me I was "so fucking pedantic" because I told him he used the majestic plural incorrectly, and in retrospect, he may have had a point.