DON'T

  1. Assume your chiropractor is joking when he says he can't touch his toes then laugh at him and say "h'okay."
  2. Share with a large group of creative people that you absolutely prefer any east coast accent - EVEN JERSEY, maybe even especially - over a British one.
  3. Ask "did you put your mouth on this?" when gifted a kazoo.
  4. Eat something that's made your mouth feel like it's been chemically burned in the past.
  5. Expect an old lady to smile back.
  6. Forget to connect to your Bluetooth headphones when playing Pac's "Hit 'em Up" while in your Uber pool.