THINGS I WANTED TO BE GROWING UP, CHRONOLOGICALLY

  1. A famous singer, age 3
    I decided against this pretty soon after because I did not want to get stampeded by fans.
  2. An actress, age 5-10, on and off between 10 and 20. Still struggling with this one!
    Not sure why I wasn't afraid of getting stampeded for this one.
  3. Chef, age 5
    Unclear about this one @Z
  4. A stripper, age 8
    On my way to 29 Palms with @Z @hannah and our parents I became taken with posters for Spearmint Rhino Gentleman's Club and began wearing a shut eye as a bra and then taking it off in front of my family
  5. Candy store owner, age 9
    I was a candy store owner for Halloween two years in a row
  6. Ari Gold/talent agent extraordinaire, age 12/13
    Entourage really influenced my impressionable brain and I wanted to grow up to be Ari Gold himself. I imagined having a penthouse office all to myself and kind of run the world. In this dream I drove a teal Range Rover and had my own parking spot