RANDOM JOBS I'VE HAD

These are some of the weird random jobs I've had over the years slaving away to customers!
  1. CEREOLOGIST™
    I'm not fucking kidding you. I sold cereal to people at $4 a bowl. It was my first customer service job at 17 and they promised we'd be working in our PJ's (like other locations) but they fell through with that promise and I still believe that's the sole reason they tanked in 4 months. Or, ya know, charging more for a ice cream sized bowl of cereal than an entire box at the store.
  2. GYM CLEANER
    Yup, that's right, I had the same job as Abbi from Broad City. Honestly? One of the best jobs I've had. I'm the Best Cleaner in the World (and will gladly prove and defend my title at any time) so it came easy, plus the guests were respectful and I could have my headphones in the whole shift.
  3. RETAIL: LINGERIE/SEX SHOP
    I feel like when I say "sex shop worker" people drop the "shop" bit and just think I was a sex worker. I sold vibrators and lingerie and a high end boutique in my town. It was a lot of fun!
  4. GROCERY BAGGER
    First I have to note that this bag is packed HORRIBLY. Yep, I was a bagger. And bagging itself wasn't too bad, especially since my store only carried paper bags so there's a nice square to place items in. My local grocery store had baggers do all of the labor tasks, like clean the whole store, bring in carts, clean bathrooms, stock eggs (and check each one, this takes a FUCKLONG time), clean spills, etc. Feet would be on fire after a 9 hour shift!
  5. CELL PHONE ACCESSORY SALES
    I worked at a kiosk at our local mall selling phone covers and chargers. This was back in '09 when smartphones weren't as big and cases for phones like the Envy and Razr were still around. It was right across from Limited Too/Justice, so I had to hear the echo of their music mixed with typical mall music. I quit the day
  6. HOTEL RECEPTIONIST/CONCIERGE
    I guess this is the most boring on the list, but I've worked at 2 hotels as the concierge 💁 (that emoji came up as a recommendation!) receptionist. One was a boutique Victorian hotel that people loved and was super pricey. The other was this nice eco-lodge on the California Coast up Highway 1 20 minutes from where I live. Cool story?
  7. CHINESE MASSAGE RECEPTIONIST
    I worked as the receptionist at one of those small Chinese Massage shops that give cheap rates. No happy endings! It was alright, pretty low key and boring but all of the Chinese masseuses would feed me delicious dumplings and soups on our downtime! 💆🏼🍜🍙
  8. PHONE DONATIONS REPRESENTATIVE
    I wasn't allowed to call myself a telemarketer or cold caller because it wasn't random, but that was pretty much my job. I called families that had a child or relative that was or had attended our local community college and asked for donations. It was... dense. I had a decent amount of freedom and we didn't have a quota we HAD to meet, instead, we were rewarded with cash incentives if we raked in the most 💰💰