Offensive Things People Said to Me When I Was Pregnant

I loved my pregnant body. I felt lush and lovely. However. Having the state of my body discussed constantly by the general public filled me with rage.
  1. Are you about to drop it?
    Man on street. What does this even mean.
  2. When's it gonna pop? WHEN'S IT GONNA POP??
    Man on street, being ignored
  3. When do you pop? Aw, c'mon bitch, you hear me. Fuck you!
    Man in trader Joe's parking lot, also being ignored
  4. There must be two in there! (Evil giggle)
    My Grandma Janie
  5. Looks like twins!
    Multiple men on street
  6. You're the fattest I've ever seen you.
    My Aunt Jeannie. Meant as a compliment, I am a thin person normally.
  7. OMG! You're soooooo pregnant!
    Girl at Ikea holding a tiny dog. I killed them with a stone cold glance.
  8. Any day now???
    Everyone. When the answer was no, 3 months to go, they argued with me.
  9. You're so big! You're so small!
  10. Looks like you're about to pop!
    Fucking everyone. Why? Who started this pop thing????? Are you talking about my vagina or my belly? Either way, fuck you.
  11. Wow, look at you! (Holds hands as far apart as possible, as if about to hug the earth)
    Man on street