SWORN ENEMIES

Inspired by @keira.
  1. Birds
    Minions of Satan.
  2. Umbrellas
    I swear I could be standing in a room with no windows or doors and any umbrella I had would flip inside out. Also cannot tell you how many times I've been jabbed in the head by idiots with no spatial awareness.
  3. This girl I was in various church groups with who my mom was always telling me I should be more like.
    I would think she was out of my life and she'd pop back in. She was one of those bullies who no adult ever believes is a bully because they act like angels when anyone is looking & never do anything directly enough to prove your point. I still expect her to show up in my life again someday. I'm not sure how, but I have a feeling.
  4. Joss Whedon.
    Bad writer, worse human.
  5. My ex-roommate's cat.
    Never shut up except for the time I spent 20 minutes tearing apart our 3-level house looking for her and wandered our street in the dark calling her & started crying thinking I'd lost her only to finally find her against the wall under roommate's bed, just chilling.
  6. The philosophy professor who stopped a lecture & said 'you look like you have something to say' & then forced me to tell him I didn't, as he did, think the Crusades were an example of Just War, & then mocked me until everyone in the class was laughing at me.
    I didn't cry until class was over, so I'm pretty sure I won this. (I mean also I was right and he was a racist, Islamophobic dickhead either way, so I definitely won this.)
  7. The pimple that perpetually exists in the same spot inside my left nostril.