CRITERIA FOR MY PERFECT LOVER

Some say I'm picky, I prefer to call them standards
  1. A firm handshake
  2. Has seen every episode of survivor
  3. Knows every word to the 14 minute version of rapper's delight
  4. Prominent Adam's Apple
  5. Good at roller skating but not better than me (real life sk8r boi)
    I wouldn't consider myself a rock star but I can get myself around without falling too often.
  6. Will drink slurpees with me every single day