Notes to My Future Anxious Self
I have a tendency to not cope with my anxiety and it leads to more anxiety and panic attacks. So here is a list for my future panicked self from my current only slightly anxious self. You can do it.
- •Amberle, remove yourself from the situation and go for a walk.If you can. If you are sitting in your room, get out. I know you want to stay there and be alone and not see anyone. You don't have to speak. Just get out of that space for a little bit.
- •If you can't leave, breatheAlright spaghetti, like Belle told you. Deep breaths. I want to see your stomach move. Focus on that. Also focus on all those muscles you have tensed. Loosen them. I know it's hard, but do it. Tense them really tight and then let them go limp. That's how you'll know when they aren't tense.
- •If you need to cry, then let yourself cryDon't hold it in. It will be worse later if you do that. If you feel like you need to cry let it out. Try not to hyperventilate because then you will have a panic attack. Cry, but make sure you still breath.
- •If you aren't doing anything, go take a showerStand there or sit if you need too. Make sure it's hot. That relaxes all this muscles you currently have tensed. Focus on the sound of the water hitting the the floor of the shower. It sounds like rain, especially if you sit down. And breathe. Really Beebs, you've got to breathe.
- •Write your feelings downYou bought that journal for a reason. It doesn't have to be a coherent story with a beginning, middle, and end. You're not writing a novel. Write everything and anything that comes to your mind. Write it down. It gets all those bad ideas running circles in your brain onto the pages. You'll be surprised how much this helps. Do this when you're angry too.
- •Drink some waterHydrate yourself. Ice water helps because it's refreshing. I don't really know why. Just do it.
- •Listen to EnyaDon't listen to anything else. Stevie Nicks will probably make it worse right now. You will cry over all the lyrics. You can listen to Stevie when you are calmer. Listen to Enya, preferably songs that are in a different language so your brain doesn't get caught up in possibly sad lyrics. Lay down and put on Enya. Close you're eyes and listen and breathe. Eventually it will feel like you are floating. Loosen those muscles too or you won't float.
- •Watch TV, but not sad TV. Funny TV onlyYou should probably just put on The X-Files, specifically Bad Blood, because you know all the words and it's funny and Mulder sing the theme song from shaft is great and Scully is pretty. You could also watch Will & Grace. That always works. Don't watch scary crime shows or medical shows. You will probably worry about being killed and then diagnose yourself with cancer. You watch this later when you are panicking.
- •Can you focus beebs? If so, colorHeather didn't get you 10 coloring books for you to look at. Break out the crayons and a coloring book and go to town. You know this worked when you were in the hospital. It will work now.
- •You can always take an Ativan if it's badThat is why you have a prescription for it. I'm just reminding you because I know you will forget about it.
- •You can also talk to someoneI know you hate talking to people about your anxiety, but you have great friends who will listen. You don't have to do it alone all the time.
- •It is okay to take a napPanic attacks are exhausting. That much anxiety is exhausting. If you take an Ativan you will get tired. It's okay. Your body needs it.
- •Now that you're at the bottom of the list and probably calmed down, when was the last time you ate?If you don't remember or it's been over like 6 hours you should go eat. I know you don't want to. I'm not talking about a full on meal. A granola bar. Make a smoothie. You like smoothies. It will be good for you. It will be cold which always feels nice.
- •Also did you take your medicine? If it's past 5 pm and you haven't taken them go take them now. If it's not 5 yet, don't forget when 5 o'clock comes around. You have an alarm for a reason. Don't ignore it.
- •You've got this. It sucks in the moment, but it won't last forever. ❤️