What I would have said to Gillian
Last night I saw Gillian Anderson in "A Streetcar Named Desire" and then after the show and Q&A about the charity I made a donation to the charity to get a picture with her. I have so much I would have loved to say but because of time and anxiety all I said was "hi" and "thank you." So this is all I wish I could have said.
- •Hi Gillian! I'm Amberle. I'm a huge fan and I want to say thank you for all you do and being who you are and for all the strong women you play that give all of us younger women someone to look up to.
- •Your performance was so unbelievably incredible I don't really know what to say. I saw "A Streetcar Named Desire" in high school at the local college. It was the first play I saw, but I didn't remember really much of anything so it was like seeing it again for the first time.I didn't realize how much I would relate to Blanche and how emotional I would feel after the play. Watching her lose herself and spiral out of control brought me back to all those feelings I had once before which led to a hospital stay. What Blanche went through at the end is my worst fear, being so far down and with no control that someone has to step in. Your performance was powerful, emotional, and to me so realistic. You were amazing.
- •Also my absolute favorite characters of yours are Dana Scully and Stella Gibson.
- •Dana Scully and The X-Files were there for me during the really low point in my life where I was losing control of my mental illnesses and I admitted myself to the hospital. While I was there my girlfriend broke up with me and then when I got out everything was different.Almost all my friends sided with my girlfriend. I had two friends I could talk to. I lived with someone who didn't say a single word to me the rest of the semester. I was ignored by my girlfriend and friends in our classes and the places we always shared. I watched The X-Files to escape my shitty situation. It let me go to a place where anything was possible and I could forget about my problems. Scully and Mulder became two more friends.
- •Scully taught me its okay to be skeptical and scientific yet still be open minded to the possibilities. "I want to believe" has stuck with me. I do want to believe that anything is possible. It's gotten more personal over the years and I want to believe that I can be strong and emotional and face my mental illnesses and conquer them.It's hard to see that future me and there are days I believe it's never going to happen, but I want to believe keeps me going. The show and Scully gave me comfort and I thank you for being part of it and making Scully who she is.
- •Also I absolutely LOVE "The Fall" and Stella Gibson.The way Stella carries herself with confidence is something I look up to. She's incredibly smart a strong feminist, and to me it seems she is so comfortable in her sexuality. When she said she had a degree in anthropology in season 1, I about fell out of bed out of excitement because I have a degree in anthropology. Her openness and confidence in her sexuality I wish I had. And her clothes! Oh the clothes! Stella is amazing all around.
- •Thank you so much Gillian for not just playing strong women, but also being one yourself. Thank you for showing me that you can be a really serious advocate and do important work to help people and stand up for what you believe in, but also be a complete goofball who may swear too much.No one can tell me now that being a silly and very weird woman with a love for swearing makes me any less of a serious advocate, feminist, or professional. Thank you!!
- •With much love, Amberle ❤️PS I'm super glad to now be a donor to SA-YES. ✌🏼