WAYS I HAVE BROUGHT DISHONOUR TO MY ASIAN FAMILY

  1. I have never played a musical instrument
  2. My Vietnamese is westernised and I don't know how to read or write in Vietnamese.
    I refused to attend Vietnamese school
  3. I resisted my parent's and grandparents' attempts to make me exclusively right handed on account that being a lefty is 'bad luck'
    They did succeed in getting me to write right handed, but I am otherwise a proud lefty (a fact that shocks them every day).
  4. I don't know how to play chess and will thus never become a chess master
    I don't even understand Chinese Checkers
  5. I don't like pork floss
  6. I don't like pork buns
  7. I can live the rest of my life without eating durian.
  8. I cannot haggle for my own good.
    Every marketplace is filled with the sound of street vendors laughing at me as I walk away having successfully conned me into paying $5 for a postcard that could've gone for $0.50.
  9. I did not succeed in getting into Opportunity Class in Primary school
  10. I did not get into the top Selective School
    But shamefully attended the fifth ranked Selective School at that time. That school is now ranked outside the Top 20. I did not help it soar.
  11. English ended up being my best subject at school, not Maths.
  12. I am not, or will not study to become a doctor or a lawyer
  13. Instead, I enrolled in Physiotherapy but dropped out a year later to start an Arts degree.
    Majoring in Writing. And Film Studies.