Requested by April K. Quioh

TOP FIVE FAVE LOS ANGELES QUIRKS

Thanks 2 @aprilkquioh
  1. 1.
    The best (only) views are from parking garages
  2. 2.
    There is no weather
    75 and sunny is the default, like a white man's perspective.
  3. 3.
    The ghost of Zooey Deschanel haunts me, but I don't mind it
    She used to frequent my favorite super-LA vaguely healthy cafe, and she bought a house in Manhattan Beach (aka the South Bay, aka my South Bae). And her literal ghost follows me around
  4. 4.
    I can use drought patterns as small talk
  5. 5.
    The sunlight erases the hopelessness from everyone's eyes (it's still there behind my F21 sunnies)