SCREENSHOTS I HAVE ON MY PHONE, EXPLAINED🍆

Welcome to my life~
  1. The roommate who didn't end up being a psycho sitting on the stairs outside my room by the kitchen apparently dying
  2. Trolling my Mom from 130 miles away
    Seriously, Linda knows where everything in the Lob is. Also yes guys, I'm Satan I shop at hobby lobby even tho I am hugely against its politics. Michael's sucks a major asshole here in Grand Rapids
  3. Linda ❤️'s chickens. Need we go further into this?
    There's a text below that says she will send me one monthly. So far she has. Sometimes they are duplicates because she didn't like the monthly chicken so she cut that one off and used a previous one she liked better. Stop chicken shaming 2k16
  4. Boyfriend text. We were talking about poop then I sent him a tit pic and uh, well, this is what happens when he has poor service 🕶
  5. My brother calling me out about my fart barriers with my boyfriend. Maybe a little regret
    Side note, I just ripped ass with him next to me. BOOYAH!
  6. Really, is there anything I need to explain about this?
  7. Dr. Frank N. Furter my sexual awakening and masturbatory icon (TO THIS DAY)
    Dadddddiiiiiiii
  8. Because honestly this happens to me at least twice a day