THINGS I ALWAYS DO WHEN I GO TO THE MALL

The Mall at Short Hills, if you really wanna know
  1. Park in the same lot regardless of where I'm planning to shop.
  2. Debate whether to preemptively get coffee or wait until I need a caffeine jolt
    Then I get coffee first, struggle with what to do with it while I sift through racks, and end up throwing it out and buying another one later.
  3. Send snapchats of myself in hats I will never buy.
  4. Simultaneously keep my eyes peeled for acquaintances I don't want to run into, and keep my head down in case they are doing the same.
    "Oh my gosh it's been forever! When was the last time I saw you? You should check out J. Crew, they're having a great sale!!"
  5. Visit the same 4 stores, get overwhelmed by everything I like but am too lazy to try on, and leave.
    A penny saved is a penny earned.