1. It's snowing. More like, it's down-pouring, snow.
  2. If anyone wanted real entertainment tonight, they should just come and watch you struggle to transfer a SIM card to your new iPhone. Yea. Technologically challenged.
  3. It's snowing.
  4. You just made some food so bad you're fairy certain no stray dog would look twice at it.
  5. Your ex finally changed his Netflix password...
  6. Going out if the house for a drink would require dressing up, putting on layers of hats and mitts, finding a coat that's the equivalent to Leo's bear fur in Revenant, and then organizing your dog sled.
  7. You thought it'd be 'intelligent', 'healthy',and 'adult' to not stock up on pizza and other snacks for the weekend. Good thing New Years resolutions are soon to expire.
  8. Did I mention it's snowing?