1. If you want a supportive friend buy Spanx.
  2. Diversify your personal portfolio.
  3. Your should not know your husband is in your Friend's fantasy reel.
  4. The sweet spot of friendship is crazy but not institutionalized.
  5. If people only invite you to sales parties and not their real parties...their not friends.
  6. If someone asks if your husband is younger then you...not friends
  7. If you run low on alcohol you will not have friends...sorry
  8. If you are making odd lists here you probably have no friends and are sad and lonely and difficult in real life...sorry