ON BEING FLAKY

  1. I'm usually really good about timing things right.
  2. It was drilled into my head from a very young age that being chronically late is a personality flaw, that it showed a lack of respect for other people's time, that it was basically an unforgivable offense.
  3. So when I'm on top of my game, I'm usually a "show up early" type.
  4. Unless!!!!
  5. Unless I'm having a particularly bad bout of anxiety.
  6. Which happens more often than I'd like.
  7. I am getting better about being honest when that is the case.
  8. And I hate that I have to compromise something that's important to me.
  9. But sometimes I'm just late because I'm too scared to get out of bed.
  10. And my friends are understanding.
  11. And the people who don't know me well enough might think I'm just flighty.
  12. Which isn't great, but is life.
  13. And that's part of the reason I'm really trying to get my anxiety in check.
  14. So that I can behave in a way that reflects my actual priorities.
  15. Instead of getting crushed under the weight of pressure I put on myself.